Couples Therapy

Arguments are becoming more frequent…

… and you don’t know how to stop them.

Pain cloaks you both as you retreat to your respective corners to lick your wounds. Every time this happens, the tension gets thicker, and your fears grow sharper.

Your mind replays all those past blowups, and you feel alienated and alone. Sometimes these feelings trigger emotions you had growing up, which makes them particularly troubling.

Naturally, you want to be protected and vindicated, so you think things like, “I would be better off single and alone.”

Your partner probably feels the same way.

The rote day-to-day encounters… they notice the lack of emotion, too.

The labored small talk… they’re present for every word.

The attempts at making connections… they’re struggling to make it work, too.

You, your partner, and your relationship are hurting…

But how do you break this cycle of defensiveness?

How do you address the issues without melting into sadness or anger?

Which one of you will take the first step toward repairing this?

Committed time and attention for you, your partner, and your relationship…

It’s a safe, structured time to deconstruct the painful dynamics you’re in, better understand yourself and your partner, and create healthier ways to navigate conflict.

In the first appointment, I learn who you and your partner are as individuals and as a couple. I gather lots of information about your relationship, asking you to tell me about the points of difficulty… and the communication styles of your families of origin. I will pause and add thoughtful comments to check my understanding of what you tell me. All this information helps us clarify the painful dynamics you’re currently experiencing.

In the following sessions, we’ll identify what’s triggering you and your partner, leaving you in a defensive or reactive state. I will teach you strategies you can employ during those heated moments to pause, calm down, and stop the escalation.

You’ll practice new ways of truly listening to each other to feel understood in your position. I will give you homework to practice these tools so you can use them well when you’re on your own.

Unburdening these difficulties is challenging.

I will work with each of you individually to help you clarify what’s deep inside that your partner needs to understand for your relationship to thrive.

Your job is to bring yourself to the session with what issues you are experiencing at the time. In each session, we work together on what you bring to share.

Committing to the process and sticking to it in difficult times is how you’ll grow and heal as a couple.

This is SO worth it for you and your partner.

Committed partner relationships often require us to grow emotionally – sometimes in uncomfortable situations.

Difficult times in partner relationships often occur because there hasn’t been a conscious attempt to grow the relationship, and we outgrow those styles of communicating and relating.

Your relationship probably wasn’t always like this. As it progressed, one or both of you likely didn’t grow as needed to keep the relationship passionate and thriving.

It’s time to do something different that honors how you both have changed.

Couples therapy gives you the help you need. Call me, and let’s schedule your free consultation: (208) 843-3638.